The wind carries you
by Rain of Glass Shards
Summary: New Moon *spoilers* What if Edward had not been stopped by Bella in time? What if the Volturi got to him? What if he never came back... forever? Angst, Character Death


Author- This is my first Twilight/New Moon fic. I have read beyond them, so don't worry about my knowledge of them! But this idea just hit me. What if Edward never returned after revealing his sparkling body in Italy? So then I wrote this just today XD.  
It actually became longer than I hoped it would. It's not really long, I think so, but still, it is in much more depth than I intended. I was hoping this would be a short story.  
Now, I'm not a Twilight fan. It becoming to mainstream for my liking. But I do enjoy reading the books. Not fascinated, but I like them. I tried to write like Stephanie to my best 17 year old ability. This isn't my first fic, so don't be frightened, I don't think it was poorly written at all.  
This is how, if Bella had lost Edward, it seems in my mind. It's a bit angst, and sad. But still... cute? haha, please read. I'm sure you'll like it ;D!

* * *

I could almost feel the ticking of the clock on the wall, nailed into it by a thick nail, holding it's rather large and old frame into place.  
It wouldn't stop, toying with me as my nerves jumbled into a heap of misunderstanding, confusion, apathy.  
The phone sitting on my desktop located before my bed rang multiple times, and I began to wonder why the battery hadn't lost it's juice and allowed the annoying thing to just die.

I wouldn't answer it, no matter who it was. There was always the possibility of it being Jacob, or his dad, or maybe my own dad who decided to not even bother with unlocking my door from outside to console me. Or perhaps it was one of the Cullen's.

A sudden spark of selfish desire built up in my stomach and danced in a frenzy of excitement as I thought about the possibility. That maybe if I had the strength to let go of my legs that were pressed against me in a tight hug, I would answer the call, and hear Alice's cheery voice.  
Hell, even Rosalie's would cheer my pitiful mood up.

But I stayed still. There's no way it could be one of the Cullen's. Knowing Edward and his lack of sympathy, tied along with his strict behavior, he probably set rules to not allow them to call, or even check up on me along with his other rules.

It was very cruel. But maybe it was for the best.

Because maybe if I did hear their voices, or even caught a glimpse of their beauty flash by my window to check on me, I would break further. The feelings and desire to end my life would probably exceed beyond my control. I would snap, and loose any mental barrier that kept me calm right now.

I remember the moment it all fell, the moment the curtains fell and my future dreams of living with him, of living with the Cullen's, of becoming a vampire and forever living with them and him burned to ashes before my eyes.

* * *

Alice had made no attempt to keep from driving as fast as possible to his acute location. I only wished that she could run out from the confines of the dark car and rush over to him as he patiently waited in the shade, waiting for the right moment to waltz out into the sun with as much care as a broken mind.

But she couldn't, and I was forced to save him. Human me, Bella, running to save the love of my life from ending himself just because he still believed I was dead.

Even to this day I blame so many reasons upon myself.  
Maybe it was because he was mislead into believing I was dead that his incredible inhuman abilities as a vampire were disabled that he didn't hear my clear loud voice yell over the crowds of people. Maybe it was the glitch in my head that didn't allow him to read my thoughts, that would have been booming in his head because of the closeness.  
Because if he had heard me, would he even be doing this?

I'm not even sure.

I remember seeing the beauty of his pale skin glitter so lightly from under his clothing as he made his way out, my hands fumbling fruitlessly against the many people that prevented me from running forward.  
"Edward!" I had yelled like a mantra, hoping that he'd hear my loud voice, almost resembling Alice's much higher pitch.  
But he didn't even spare a glance towards my direction as he allowed the shirt to fall to his waist, held against him like a rag as his revealed arms still spared some coverage around his forearms.

There was a following chorus of sharp gasps, the various foreign mutters and hushed whispers flowing like a diseased river, pounding against my ears, making my stomach turn in constant flops, a flutter of lost hope.

Suddenly, it all felt like a dream.

My watery eyes looked past the frozen crowd of people standing in front of me, the visible glare of crystal diamonds burning my vision, taunting me to look away.  
But I didn't, I bared the pain building into my eyes creating a migraine, unlike the others around who covered their eyes and blindly scooted away from the beautiful vampire.

I couldn't understand what they yelled, not that it mattered. They were all probably yelling and questioning the same thing.  
Questions as to wondering what he was, why this man was glittering, why he was so pale, why he stood so still like a statue with no breath, and why were his canine teeth extremely and frighteningly sharp.  
And at that moment, as I felt my legs nearly give out under me, I wondered the same thing. It was as if the secret was revealed to me all over again.

My mouth opened, my throat squeezing as I tried to scream his name, to run, to beg him to leave.  
But It was useless, because nothing came out.  
Just a squeal and a million heaves came out in short panicked gasps as I allowed my tears to flow freely down my face.

I heard Alice call my name behind me, screaming, demanding that I get back into the vehicle. But it was as if the shinning body in the middle of everyone didn't let me turn to her.  
I knew the cars window was open, I could tell by the clear voice of panic that came from it, because I knew she was aware that no one would look to her, Edward being the main distraction.

My brows knotted upward so tightly that it only made my headache worse. I must have looked horrible compared to Edward. But I could care less, because even if Edward made it through and saw my hideous face, I knew it was over.

Something from within myself told me that even if he came walking to me, parting the scared pedestrians around to reach my fallen form, to touch me, he would be whisked away.... Alice had informed me of their form of government, The Volturi.  
She said that if we didn't stop Edward before he revealed their existences secret, they would end him.

A sudden impulse ran through me, and I stood quickly, trying to take over the sudden spin in my head as the throbbing got worse and I was sure I would faint.

Determination coursed through me, and I began to push as much as my limp arms could manage, ignoring the many curses from those around me as I harshly shoved past them, trying to get to him.  
It was as if I was strong enough, as if I was even capable of grabbing and taking him into my arms before they got to him. As if I could fight them off and keep Edward safe.

I honestly felt that way, even though I knew it was impossible. I was an ant compared to their superhuman strength. They would throw me across the city if they had to force me out of my false trance of stubborn protection.

My legs didn't stop pacing though, adrenaline rushing through my vain's, creating a strength that I felt flex my pitiful muscles.

It seemed too dreamlike, my zombie like eyes, apathetic glare of determination planted on my face, almost as if I were in a trance and the light was the source of my obsession.

I managed to get to the edge of the crowd, stood out before all of them, covering my eyes slightly with my long sleeve covered arm as I walked closer hesitantly, afraid that I might trip on something I was incapable of seeing past the burning light.

A smile spread across my face, the sudden feeling of victory lifting me up into a self sanctuary as I reached out towards him.  
I was long gone mentally, my eyes staring in quivering awe upon the man before me, glowing in all his glory of self sacrifice as he looked up to the heavens with relaxed lids and a simple graceful smile upon his tight lips.  
But my arms still reached out, my fallen fingers struggling to stay up as I nearly tumbled forward and latched onto him.

My lips parted as a huff of happiness escaped my lips, forming into words, about to call his name.  
But he heard my sob before I even touched him, and he quickly looked down to me, too quickly for my mind to comprehend, and his lips mouthed my name in a soft whisper I couldn't hear.

His golden eyes went wide, his arm quickly moving upwards to hold my out held hand. But just as quickly he was cloaked in darkness.

A sudden shiver of movement, the audible flaps of fabric, devoured him completely.  
And my Edward became a clothed black figure, then shot away from me so quickly, that it was as if they never came.

I stood still, arm still out, fingers outstretched. The silence suddenly broke, the mummers and gasps around me quickly fluttering like the fast blades of a fan spinning around me, confused about the sudden disappearance of the glistening man.

My legs gave out again, and I fell to a crumpled heap of loss, not minding the fact that I was the center of attention sitting like a broken doll in the middle of a huge circle of people.  
No one even bothered to come up and ask me what was wrong, why I had attempted to get close to the inhuman figure.  
And I was thankful for that.  
Because what would I have said?

I would have most likely grabbed the innocent bystander and would have forced him into a tight hold as I cried my heart out along with his name. Not that I wasn't already.

I was suddenly in air, my body felt as if it was in floating with harsh jolts as I felt the breeze of speed hit my face.

"She's with me!" Alice cried from the porche, her window still down. The speed came to a complete halt, and then began once more as it headed towards the sound of a running engine that was undeniably attached to the luxurious vehicle.  
"Put her down." She further instructed, and I was suddenly down, my shaking legs forcing me to stand as my limp body leaned against the exterior.

Instinctively my hand gripped the window, my fingers pressing against the other side, visible to the short vampire who was undoubtedly in tears also.  
"Bella, get in." She instructed fiercely.  
But I shook my head as I cried further, my head resting against the window frame as I presented my messy face past the dark tainted window.

She sighed and turned the car off. I could hear her small frame shuffle against the seats as the leather squeaked in sudden protest against her weight.  
I felt a cold hand wrap around my fingers in a light grip, forcing me to realize the situation, to open my eyes and look to her.

Eventually I did, as she patiently waited, and I rose my head slightly, looking into the small crack that allowed some light in.  
"Oh, Alice." I whispered lightly, trying to ignore my reflection that looked up towards me, my eyes inflated and red. I looked more horrible than I thought.  
But she looked perfectly beautiful. How could I ever think of this creature as a monster when even through tears she looked like an angel?

"Bella." She whispered, her hand gripping my fingers tightly, but not as tight as she was capable of, I knew that. "Please, get in the car. I promise we'll find him. We'll take him back. I promise."  
But something about her tone, her face, the way she seemed, told me that she was lying. There was no way he would be let free after making his existence known. But I nodded, regardless, because I also believed in her words slightly as my heart cried out in sorrow.

The promise was never fulfilled.

I remember going over to the Cullen's mansion that night. I sat on the piano's white stool, the exact place I sat on when I watched Edward play out a melting song he composed himself... for me.  
Carlisle had lost control. I could hear him as he snapped every few seconds, muttering words too quickly for my understanding.

My fingers lightly ghosted over the black and white keys, trying to press the right notes that he had played the night we sat here together.  
But I didn't touch them, too scared that my klutzy fingers would ruin the burning memory of the tune implanted in my mind.

Unfortunately it was soon shattered as I flinched greatly when I heard the sound of a door hitting against a wall on the floor I sat in, clearing away the memory of the sound it made when it was torn from its hinges along with the following audible strong wind as it fell from the second floor.

I cursed silently as I saw the ways my fingers shook against the indented keys I applied pressure on, turning around on the stool to look behind me with wide eyes as I observed the way the door had actually traveled a great diagonal distance from the second floor to the first floors wall, carved in as if it belonged there already.

"Please! Calm down!" I could hear Esme plead as her small feet patted again the floor chasing behind large stone heavy ones. "Honey-"

"No!" I knew it was Carlisle, instantly, despite the change of his familiar kind tone. "Do you understand the gravity of the situation?! Edward has been taken in by the Volturi!" His voice boomed, followed by a large sigh, echoing throughout the large, silent home. "Oh god... Jane will not spare him..." He said quietly. But I could still hear his troubled quivering voice.

I nodded in response, though I knew he could not see me. My wide eyes looked over the keys, slowly rising to look to the stand that was placed over it, no music laying over it's beautiful frame. And I stared at my scared reflection over it's crystal glass.  
"Of course." I whispered to myself quietly, feeling a sudden urge to stop breathing as my mind became clouded. T  
he sudden feeling of drowning took over me, and my eyes fell back down towards the keys as they blurred.  
My eyes drowsily came to a slow shut, and I was met with blissful darkness.

-

I then awoke in my room.  
My body flung upwards, and I sat, my breathing quick.  
I couldn't sleep any longer, feeling as though I was missing something I usually comforted.  
Something, like a child cuddles his favorite blanket to allow his eyes to rest.  
And it dawned me as the sudden flood of the recent incident ran through my mind.

My hands flung out to my sides, pressing against the mattress to force myself into an upright position as my head turned over and around, even nearly over my shoulders in a complete circle as I searched helplessly. As if I would see him there, laying as still as a statue with that incredible smirk. With those golden eyes that glistened slightly red from their rims.

But he wasn't there.

Large gasps swallowed past my lips as I took in sharp quick breathes in a frenzy of panic, one of my hands resting against my raising chest as the other pressured most of my weight to keep me from tumbling off the mattress.

A sharp touch of freezing ice lightly pricked at my skin, sending goose pimples all over my body. I quickly turned towards it, hugging it's freezing body, the temptation to kiss it's lips screaming in my head. But I didn't, because even if I wanted to pretend, I knew it wasn't him.

"Shh, shh, it's okay Bella." She whispered as she held me tightly, one of her strong arms wrapped around my torso as the other rested against my back as its hand laced around my hair, messaging my scalp slightly. "Jasper, mind helping her out?" Her voice seemed distant as she seemed to turn her head away from me, towards someone behind her.

I heard the cautious footsteps of an individual near my bed, their hand holding my arm that wrapped around Alice tightly with freezing tenderness.

By now I was too cold. But I didn't care. Because as long as I felt the traces of those who I held so dearly to my heart I wouldn't mind freezing to death.

"Come here." His voice was quiet, a whisper.  
Alice let me go slowly, almost as if she was afraid that I'd fall over. But just as quickly as her fingers ran along my skin as she pulled away completely another persons hands substituted hers and held me, sliding up my arms and the wrapping me into a soft hug, allowing my head to rest against their shoulder as I cried against their chest.

"Bella?" He called, and with a struggling lift of my heavy head I looked up to Jasper, my eyes narrowed and blurred by my running tears.  
His face was as dead and soulless as a doll. It frightened me to see the effect this caused upon him.  
I didn't even mind the fact that this cheery boy that didn't usually talk to me was calling my name. It would have usually shocked me, is what I'm implying.

He pulled me away slowly, holding me a short gap away to keep himself from smelling my scent as he looked to me. A sudden grin cracked his lips as he tilted his head slightly as if he was trying to figure me out. "I want you to calm down. Can you do that for me?" He asked from me.  
And almost instantly I fell under his charming spell. The feelings of dread and mourning slowly clearing away as if I had taken some drug that emptied me.

I was aware though, about Edward being gone, perhaps dead. About the fact that this was reality and not a dream. But the wanting to cry and throw a fit out of mere pain disappeared completely. It truly was a spell I could not over power. And I minded that, feeling disgusted for holding back my tears. But I couldn't do anything about it.

"Do you think we should stay with her tonight?" Alice asked worriedly over his shoulder.

I felt completely empty. It was as if I had turned into a soulless creation. But I was too calm to force myself to freak out like I wanted too. Even as Alice spoke I was forced to gaze at Jasper's beautiful face, as if he was making me stare at him.

Jasper shrugged lightly, not looking away from me. But he looked anything but willing. It was if he also wanted to crawl into the smallest hole ever and remain there until his sorrow dissolved. Maybe he was capable of achieving that. But only god could guess how long it would truly take me to do that. To forget.

"Bella." He spoke again, my eyes still to him, not moving, unblinking. "I want you to go to sleep, 'k?" He, again, asked from me. And without much strength I nodded my head, closing my eyes slowly.  
I was slowly lowered, and my body met with the warmth of my bed, the sudden drape of a blanket covering me in an instant.

"Is she asleep?" Alice asked, her body pushing against the mattress, and I heard the tip of her feet poking at the light wood of my room floor.

"Yes." Jasper answered. But he was wrong. I was yet asleep, as if the glitch in my brain over took the spell and allowed me this much body power.  
"Alice," He began, and I could tell the lack of caution in his tone, as if he truly believed I was incapable of hearing him. "What did you see yesterday?" Had it really been a whole day? But it was night out, the clock in my room indicated that it was past noon. I was sure that I had just gotten home. Apparently I was wrong.

Alice sighed, swallowing loudly just as if she were lusting to quench her thirst. "You really won't leave me from that, will you?" She muttered so quickly that it seemed as if she spoke a single word. She shifted again, her lighter weight, undoubtedly hers compared to Jasper's, and my bed indented from the far end lightly. "He's really not coming back." She said quietly, monotone, apathetic.

I was glad that I was incapable of showing the fact that I was completely aware of what she said, because then I would have gasped and thrown myself out the window in an instant with a speed I wished I owned.

"I know that." Jasper hissed, and my chest swarmed with sudden fright. "I mean what exactly did you see?" He demanded, his voice facing towards her.

"I don't know," I could see her shaking her head from my mind like she usually did when she said that. "Italy's too far. It was too vague." But her tone proved that she was lying.

Silence followed, and I could tell it was probably a stare down as Jasper glared the truth from her.

"Fine!" She sighed. "Your cruel you know that!?" She hissed passed what sounded like clenched teeth. "Forcing me to admit this! I want to forget as much as you do!" Jasper quickly shushed her, her tone was raising. At least he was aware of Charlie's existence. "They killed him, ok?" She finished with clear anger. It was such a threatening tone, it seemed as if she was about rip Jasper's face off.

"What?" Jasper whispered in return. Apparently he didn't think they would kill him other than just imprison him.

"They killed him. He's gone." She whispered slowly, as if she was viewing, visioning this all over in within her mind. "He's a pile of ashes now." My heart skipped a beat, I was sure of it.

I mentally cursed, thinking that they heard it, but it seemed that they were too into the conversation to even notice my presence.

"But... But it was a vision right? That means it hasn't happened yet." Jasper stuttered, his voice hopeful.

"They killed him this morning." Alice added in a hushed tone, almost as if she regretted saying if I surely caught on, then no doubt Jasper did Jasper snapped his teeth in the anger I wished I could express.

"You mean you saw it yesterday but didn't do anything to prevent it from happening?!" He hissed quickly. "What the hell Alice?!"

"Because we would have all died too, Jasper!" She hissed back. "Edward was already sentenced to his death as soon as he had the fucking idea to reveal himself! How would you even allow the idea to leave Bella alone?!"  
Silence followed, and this seemed to give Alice the urge to keep talking.  
"What would become of Bella if we all died to save Edward? We're powerless against the Volturi.... Especially against Jane..." She whispered, her voice directed towards the window.

Jasper kept quiet, not finding that statement worth arguing about. But his anger radiated into me, and I felt his reason instantly. He didn't care for me as much as Alice did. He would have sacrificed himself to at least attempt saving him. And I appreciated that from him. Because I'm pretty sure that I would have done so too if I was a vampire.

"Jasper, calm down, she's cringing." Alice advised, her body moving the mattress as she neared to observe my face in the darkness illuminated by the crescent moon peeking into my window.

Instantly my body became numb, and I truly fell asleep after feeling the cold hold of strong arms wrap around me, just as Edward did every night.

-

I woke the next morning alone, the feelings of calm instantly melting from me now that Jasper was too far away to keep me under his ability.  
But for some reason, I didn't cry. It was as if I was completely empty from tears, incapable of shedding them as if I had already dried myself from them.

I looked up as I ruffled my messy hair, placing a tangled strand behind my ear, my head turning towards the desktop across from me.

There, shinning brightly against the lack of sun outside, was a white note, waiting for me.  
Instantly I figured it was new, because I knew about it not being there before Alice and Jasper came to check up on me. And gratefully consoled me, fortunately dawning the news before me thinking that I was asleep.

My feet dragged across the messy bed and planted onto the warm wooden floor. I forced myself up and off the bed, walking towards the note scribbled with small neat black font. I wondered if it was written by a feather and ink with the curves and impressive scribbling. But the simple pen that sat beside it, uncapped and overused, informed me otherwise.

I picked it up, my finger shaking uncontrollably before my eyes even read the words, almost as if I knew before hand what the letter held in it's reason.

_"Dear Bella,_

_We love you very much, please know this before you read on. We would have sacrificed ourselves to keep you happy with Edward if we could save him. Unfortunately, if we attempted, we would have returned empty handed and,"_

I skipped through the first few sentences, already hearing this the night before. And I honestly did not want to relive the moment.

_"We will really miss you."_

I stopped there, my eyes raising a few paragraphs as I curiously fought against the urge to ask aloud what she meant by that, the idea of what it did indicate slowly seeping into my mind, freaking me out.  
My hands began to shake greatly as I forced myself to read the sentences before that.

_"We have been asked by The Volturi to keep away from you by all means. They think that Edward was **forced** to reveal the secret. Basically they think you told him to do this, since they saw you standing a foot away before they caught him. We tried to explain that you didn't, but they didn't believe us. Or simply came to the deduction that he did this for you due to a troublesome relationship. Although it is true Bella, because he thought you died-"_

"Only because you led everyone to believe I was." I whispered through gritted teeth, shaking my head and forcing myself to read on.

_"- when you jumped off the cliff. But we didn't tell them that.  
They found you a hazard, still do, so we must keep away.  
If we don't, they'll kill our source of obsessions, in other words, attachment. They'll kill you Bella. They really will. Edward has been a great and helpful asset. They destroyed him without a second thought. They would care less about killing you too.  
So please Bella, understand why we find your safety a priority.  
This was also Edward's wishes. The reason why we stayed away after he left is because he asked us to. And we did, because we also blamed ourselves. This is undoubtedly our fault too Bella. So we must stay away for your safety, and as Edward wishes.  
We love you Bella, we really do.  
And although we may not be around all the time, we will be watching you, protecting you. So don't fear for your safety against The Volturi or Victoria."_

A gasped lightly, forgetting about the red haired beauty throughout this ordeal, the fact that she was still alive.

_"We will miss you greatly. Not even these scribbled words and damp imprinted tears can express how much we love you. But we love you so much, so much, that we are not doing this for self reason. We are doing this out of love and protection.  
Please find it in your heart to forgive us. And please, live happily. We love you.  
But remember always, Edward loves you more than anything, more than we can explain or comprehend. And he always, always will.  
Good-bye Bella._

_Love,  
Alice,  
The Cullen's."_

The note slipped from my fingers, slowly falling to the ground onto my bare feet, drops of liquid, my tears, seeping into the sheet, darkening the paper and the ink.  
I fell back onto my bed, my legs uncomfortably hanging over the edge from the knee below, my feet hovering over the ground.  
One of my hands covered my mouth as I muffled my gasps, wishing to feel those cold arms that once hugged me so tightly, protectively.

* * *

The phone rang again, and I stared at it, almost wanting to lift it with my mind and fling it out the window as my thin body pressed against the wall.

I looked out towards the dark afternoon, the gray clouds speeding in the sky as winds forced everything to dance towards it's headed direction, creeping into my room and blowing a chilling breeze against my pale skin.  
But it could not compare to the chalky white of a vampire.  
My bare legs goose pimpled, the short shorts only covering some of my thighs. The spaghetti strap top that covered my torso revealed my arms to the gust of strong winds that even seemed to push my cell phone across the desk by a few millimeters.

A knock at the door tore me from my gaze, and I suddenly felt the cold air, as if I was awoken from a trance.  
"I'm still alive, Ch-.. Dad." I muttered back with a hoarse voice. And like always, the steps walked down the stairs and towards the living room.  
Charlie usually did this.

He never understood as to why I suddenly locked myself up my room. He did hear from Alice that Edward _"broke up"_ with me and that I was depressed about the ordeal. He even lectured and sat outside my door for about and hour as to why I should look past it and be happy. But he didn't know the truth.

And even if I told him and shouted the truth at the top of my lungs, he'd want to know about the whereabouts of the body, why the Cullen's didn't have a funeral, how he died.  
And as a cop, Charlie would even go as far as interrogating the Cullen's until he got a suspects name.

I huffed, how great would that go?  
Emmett and his stubborn attitude would only keep up the secret for so long under Charlie's annoying pressure that he'd tell him the whole thing.

Charlie, going out to hunt down the Volturi. That didn't even fit my imagination well. Especially not the after, once the mostly mentioned Jane tortured him to death.  
I shook.  
No more deaths. No more please.

The phone rang again, and I kept glaring at it, finding the strength to move off my stuck position, ignoring the pain in my tight sore muscles as I crawled across the mattress and off, standing with weak legs and walking towards it.

My heart nearly ran up my throat, a lump built up, and my body went completely cold. Almost as if a vampire was behind me, holding me.  
I hunched over, ignoring the protest of my backs skin as the bones poked out visibly. I couldn't believe what I was reading on the caller I.D.  
Alice had told me in all honesty, that I believed, that Edward's phone was destroyed when Rosalie told him about Alice's vision of my leap.

So how is it that his....?  
I'm surely hallucinating. Yup, that's it. Lack of sleep, food, the cold wind that has probably made me further ill, is making me think that this is happening. Or I might in fact be dreaming.

But I still picked the phone up and held it tightly in my hand, watching as the blue light of the screen illuminated my face, his name neatly printed out with the machines font.  
I flipped it open quickly, hoping that I would reach the send button before the ringing stopped. And I did, the seconds on the screen counting, indicating that the conversation had begun.

Slowly, I placed the phone to my ear, my wide eyes glued to the table before me, no longer existing as I payed no attention no anything around me at all, just this conversation.  
"Hello?" I whispered, controlling the quiver in my voice. "Hello?" I repeated loudly, almost lashing out, not caring about Charlie hearing me go nearly insane.

I wasn't even sure if this conversation was taking place.

"Hello?" I asked, my voice blubbered with pitiful sobs as my other hand also gripped the phone tightly, pushing it against my ear so harshly that I knew the skin along my cheek would bruise.  
There was an eerie distant sound of electric fizzle, as if the person on the other line was standing where low reception was received.  
My head fell slightly, and I whispered shakily,"Please, answer me-"  
A loud noise, like the noise a TV made when it was set to a channel of snow, screeched against the speaker, that I nearly dropped it from it's sharp pain and of utter fright.

But I swore, with all my being and strength, over looking the fact that I might be insane, or that this might be a dream, I swore I heard a whisper in the flurry static. His voice. Soft, barely audible. But it was his.  
This, I was sure of.

"Re...m...er." The voice carried out calmly under all the fuzz, breaking off often due to the eerie static. "Al...ys.." He slowly spoke, as if he was out of breath. "L...ve."

"What?" I spoke loudly in return, pressing the phone even tighter against my ear. "I.. Edward? I can't hear you. Please, louder? Your.. Your breaking up." I wasn't even sure if I was suddenly excited, or scared of loosing his voice.  
But as soon as I finished my sentence there was a soft click.

Shaking uncontrollably, my heart dropping instantly, I pulled the phone away, looking to the screen to make sure it did in fact end.  
And surely, the minutes blinked for a few seconds before disappearing, and retrieving into the former cell phone screen.

My fingers stumbled, trembled against the key pad, going to the phone book to look up all the missed calls. The phone slipped from my hold, and clattered loudly against the floor. "Edward..." I whispered.  
They had all been from Edward. But how?

I retrieved the phone quickly, scooping it off the ground in a quick movement that I nearly fainted from sudden dizziness. I looked up the voicemail count, finding it odd how there was only one.

Slowly, with unexplainable hesitation, I pushed number one, the voicemail quickly activating, the robotic voice of a female instructing me to my messages. I pressed one again, and surely enough, it was there, a single message. The female voice talked for a few seconds, informing me of when the message was left. Then it began.

Again, there was a flutter of loud static, fizzled pops, changing volumes and noises, that lasted for a few seconds. I pressed the phone against my ear, raising the volume by the side button to it's maximum level. And surely enough, there was the familiar voice, that whisper, calm and exhuasted.

"Be...a... Re...m..er... t.h...t... I'..l... Alw...s.. Lov... Y..o.." Static followed again, and I was hoping the beautiful voice would repeat what it had said, knowing that he was unclear. But a silent click ended the message, the females voice quickly speaking afterwords.

I shut the phone before she finished whatever she was about to say, and fell to the ground, the note that had remained on the floor for nearly a month resting under my bony leg, the words that Alice wrote sticking out like a subliminal message hinting me of Edward's soft words._  
"But remember always, Edward loves you more than anything, more than we can explain or comprehend. And he always, always will."_

My mind quickly puzzled it together. And I cried upon understanding what he said.  
_"Bella, Remember that I'll always love you."_

I rose the phone to my face, looking up his name, and pressing the send button quickly, the phone set tightly against my ear. But there was no ring.  
Just a repeating tone, and a robotic voice belonging to his phone company informing the caller, me, that the phone has been disconnected, and was not in service. It then told me the date that the phone had been removed from further service.  
The exact day that Alice stood in wait for Charlie only to be surprised by me, thinking that I was dead. And that was long before any of this happened.

I stared to the phone in utter shock.  
"But-" it was Edward who called. I checked my voicemail again, since I had yet to delete the message, and even if I had, it would be in the pile of the other deleted ones. But as soon as I reached the line, the female voice informed me that I had no messages, neither deleted, as if none was received.

But it was him...

I know it.. I'm so sure of it. It was. I had even tested my awareness afterwords, pacing back and forth along my room trying to see if I was asleep or even the slightest mentally high. But I was too aware, too awake. And something within me told me that it was his call, his voice. That he somehow got to me from where ever he was.

"Bella?"

I turned upon the familiar voice that came from my open window. The one that I kept open ever since the incident hoping to see him crawl in, and grin at me with that teasing smile as if this never happened. As if this was all a cruel joke.  
But no one was there.

A loud intake of breath, my own, echoed throughout my room, and I dropped the note and phone in hand, rushing towards the window, poking my head outside, my head turning, desperately searching for him. But he was no where in sight.  
I even squinted my eyes and focused as much as I could to every dark area in the distance, shrouded by bare trees.

My eyes darted downward, and I looked down to the slab of fixed wood placed a few feet under my window that Edward always broke no matter how many times Charlie fixed it. But it was as smooth and untouched as it had been since it's last fix.

But he was gone. I knew that. It never took a lot of time for that fact to sink in. He was dead... No, murdered.

My pale thin fingers gripped the windows outer frame as I stared out towards the blank landscape drapped in snow. "I love you too." I whispered through shaky lips. "I love you... Edward." I whispered again, and stared at the sudden falling snow that further drapped the land with an innocent blanket.  
I closed my eyes, forcing the held tear to fall down my chin and drip off my chin to the snow below, as I heard Edward again, whisper my name lovingly, and disappear as soon as the wind blew harshly, whisking away his voice, and my pain.

* * *

Author- Sorry if it was boring. My fics tend to be dramatic and serious. I guess you can say not intended for the kiddies who want to read something blunt and straightforward. I tried to imply little detail to keep readers from closing the page, because I know people desire more action and words rather than thought and emotions.  
But if you read through, thank you!

And if you liked it, thank you very much!  
This might be the only fic I write about this series. I honestly am unsure. I like messing around with it a little. But a Twilight fic doesn't dawn on me as much as other series fics do. It really depends on how much you, the audience, enjoyed readin it.  
And because I can't see your reaction, or hear you, a comment would be the only form of indication that you'd like me to write further fics on this series.  
So if it doesn't bother you much, would you be so kind as to leave a comment?

Again, thank you, and Merry X-mas and a Happy New years. Happy Hanuka, Quanza, all those other holidays currently taking place!


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